I just realized the power of word “Don’t” to my kids. This simple word has influenced a great deal of my two kids’ characteristics. But don’t think that good characters have been created by this word; it is absolutely in the opposite.
My first son is almost 10 years old and now he is coming to the end of his last year in elementary school meanwhile the second daughter still studies at the fourth grade at the same school as his brother studies. They both grow up very well physically but there is something I don’t feel convenient about their attitudes.
My son looks so timid and does not like talk much within the family; he prefers keep his feeling and secrets. He is not quite open in expressing his idea and not as cheerful as other kids of his age. He also does not like to do things around the house or I could conclude that he is a lazy boy. His sister is quite different from him; she looks to be curious about everything and always gets upset when my wife or I say “don’t do this” or “don’t do that”. Those words are not only for her; her brother seems to have fed up with those words since his early age and this always makes him restricted and limited in doing thing. Everything is banned; perhaps it is what lies in his head that makes him lazy to do things.
Her sister apparently goes too much when we say “don’t”; she will do it! She will try to figure out why we say “don’t” to her until she finds out the reason or even the risk. Sometimes she will furtively do something behind us that we “don’t” allow her to do. Not few times has she got problems with her health and safety because we banned her to do things.
Wow, the word “don’t” is indeed a very strong thing that needs more consideration for parents to use it in facing their kids. It is not bad to use the word but our role as the parents takes us to be wiser in expressing it.
My first son is almost 10 years old and now he is coming to the end of his last year in elementary school meanwhile the second daughter still studies at the fourth grade at the same school as his brother studies. They both grow up very well physically but there is something I don’t feel convenient about their attitudes.
My son looks so timid and does not like talk much within the family; he prefers keep his feeling and secrets. He is not quite open in expressing his idea and not as cheerful as other kids of his age. He also does not like to do things around the house or I could conclude that he is a lazy boy. His sister is quite different from him; she looks to be curious about everything and always gets upset when my wife or I say “don’t do this” or “don’t do that”. Those words are not only for her; her brother seems to have fed up with those words since his early age and this always makes him restricted and limited in doing thing. Everything is banned; perhaps it is what lies in his head that makes him lazy to do things.
Her sister apparently goes too much when we say “don’t”; she will do it! She will try to figure out why we say “don’t” to her until she finds out the reason or even the risk. Sometimes she will furtively do something behind us that we “don’t” allow her to do. Not few times has she got problems with her health and safety because we banned her to do things.
Wow, the word “don’t” is indeed a very strong thing that needs more consideration for parents to use it in facing their kids. It is not bad to use the word but our role as the parents takes us to be wiser in expressing it.